The Inner Mom

Middle Child Syndrome

2009-12-16T07:56:00.000-08:00

Being a middle child myself i never realized how true the phrase "middle child syndrome" was until our second child was born 4 months ago. Now technically she is not a middle child yet but my husband and i know we will have more kids so she will be...shortly (no dad I am not pregnant).

I started blogging as a way to keep a quote "baby book" for our oldest. We also started a picture blog so that our family who dont get to see our kids everyday can log on and see what mess they have gotten into lately and how much they are growing.

Then I realized our second child was born and it all stopped. The easy thing to do would be to say that i no longer have time. Which truly isnt a stretch of the imagination. But honestly that isnt the reason. I dont know why ive stopped.

It wasnt until this past thanksgiving that i even realized i was – or wasn’t doing this. We spent four days with at my in-laws house and as we were leaving i realized i hadn’t taken one picture of Emmas FIRST thanksgiving! Not one. Im a terrible mom! Especially since we have...oh only a hundred of our first born, Ellie at her first Thanksgiving. And not just thanksgiving but literally hundreds of pictures of her just sitting there, laying there when she was first born, sleeping! And what of Emma i have some pictures from the hospital...4 1/2 months ago! What is wrong with me! So the middle child syndrome that most middle children talk about (and yes i am one) starts from the beginning - we aren’t even given a chance!

Feeling really bad now so today starts a new day. I will do my best to take pictures everyday (even if she’s sleeping) and keep my blog updated so that when Emma wants to know what day she sat up or rolled over...i will know.

A little bit of heaven

2009-10-27T06:59:00.000-07:00

Recently my 16 mth old has decided that our coffee and end tables are not to put pictures or lamps on..no no, they are for her sitting and standing pleasure. Have you ever fought a losing battle? I am as I type. If I so much as step out of the room to pee shes on top of the coffee table when I get back. I cant even think about showering anymore god knows what she would find to climb then! The hardest part of this is how do you discipline a 16 mth old? Shes a little too young for time out (at least a successful one) so when I try to explain that we don’t climb on tables that couches are for us to sit on, she just looks at me and smiles as if to say “you keep talking but I have NO idea what you are saying.” And about a second later I am back in the fight!

To try to combat this I decided she needed a toy that she can climb on without getting into trouble and it would be a HUGE plus if this piece of equipment entertained her for let’s say hours….now what could be so amazing!!?? As it turns out for a one year old those requirements fit just about any new toy (turns out for adults it’s just as easy ..ask my husband who just got an iphone) So what did I find you ask?? After hours of searching online I found a little tykes play gym that was perfect! The problem was the price was NOT- so perfect. I turned to old trusty..craigslist. For those of you who have yet to try it or have a stigma about buying used items you need to at least give it a try. I cant say enough great things about it. Wouldn't you know that I found exactly what I was looking for for a fraction of the cost. And bonus – it was in great condition. After some friendly bargaining I got my daughter a wonderful play set with tunnels, things she can climb on and a slide – HELLO HEAVEN! Not only is she enthralled with this play set but it’s a magic babysitter too! I showered…she played. I made dinner…she played. She played, and played and played and last night we had 2 babies sleeping at 730. This toy goes on my MUST HAVE for toddlers list!

Hiadas

2009-10-26T16:28:00.000-07:00

Im back, and so are the stories in a BIG way! There is a lot to write about. After being on hiadas for a few months I think I have enough material for a few years! To start we finally welcomed number 2 in august, Emma. I have to say she looks nothing like me or my husband. If it weren’t for the fact that she never left my bedside in the hospital, I would seriously think a switch had been made. Now I know most people think babies are beautiful and cute, I’m not one of those people. I think most babies look like aliens until at least 3 months of age (for some it takes even longer). Emma fits that description to a tee. Imagine an alien head; the shape is oval at the top and the chin comes to a point, with really big eyes…that’s my child. My sisters were gracious enough to point that out to me. Thanks again girls.

To date things are generally going as I thought they would. We had a bit of a jealousy problem in the beginning but my husband soon got over the new baby being home : ) OK so it wasn’t him but we did have jealousy about the new baby with Elle. Not like some stories I hear; the older sibling trying to hurt the new baby, or burry her in toy and blankets. For us it was just more temper tantrums and reverting back to the baby stages. Ellie refused to walk and started crawling again, needed to be carried everywhere, insisted on sitting in the baby swing and thought that she could fit back into her car seat. It didn’t take long before she realized that Emma was here when she woke up and here when it was bedtime and no one came to pick her up at dinner time.

Now she is a remarkable older sister. She gets Emma her binki when she cries, gives her kisses all time and helps with her bath time. As far as the girls go we are very lucky. As far as toddlers go…we’re writing the book!

SACRIFICES OF MOTHERHOOD

2009-07-15T17:33:00.000-07:00

Right now my best friend is in California on a “business trip” – I didn’t know business included 2 wineries before noon! I want a business trip! Granted she did have to leave her 6 month old home with daddy and grandma for the week – and while I know that was really hard for her, I’m not feeling so bad now! Hell, I would volunteer for the next business trip and I don’t even work there!

After I got that text message I started feeling down that we don’t live in a more exciting area. Not so much for me but for our kid(s). I grew up in New Jersey. I had New York, Philadelphia, Boston and the shore all within a drive of me. It was wonderful! We were always on the go, never searching for things to do. Now I live in Kansas (that’s another blog), and for fun I have a plastic pool in my back yard for my daughter to play in and a corner town bar that serves beer out of jars. I do love where we live I just wish it were more exciting.

My husband is a Midwest boy so when I try to explain to him that I feel like we’re missing out on life here he doesn’t understand it. It’s been an ongoing battle for years, but because I love him dearly I traded in my manolo blahnik’s for aerosols and sneakers. I can’t blame all that on him; I have to say motherhood has really changed my fashion too. I always thought I would be that stylish mom, the one everyone wants to dress like. That’s not exactly what has happened. I’ve been tainted by magazine covers and TV shows with stylish moms wearing the latest fashions and heals while grocery shopping. GET REAL. I think its great that Victoria Beckham aka Posh Spice can wear platform heals and skin tight clothing while carrying her youngest son, but that’s just not reality of a suburban mom.

These days my choice of clothing is whatever is semi clean, no stains preferable and not covered in dog hair. Some mornings I’m even pulling a shirt off the floor and smelling it before deciding that it’s just going to have to do. I wouldn’t exactly be looking on the next cover of Style Magazine for my picture!

Yes, motherhood and marriage does come with an awful lot of sacrifice and change. And yes, I do miss the upbeat life I once had. But I wouldn’t change anything for the world. I have an amazing daughter who is the light of my life and a husband who loves me when I’m at my worst. While living in Kansas isn’t exactly Sex in the City and we may not have a beach within 1700 miles of us, life here is good.

EVER WONDER WHAT THEY ARE THINKING?

2009-07-15T09:14:00.000-07:00

Everyday my daughter does something and i find myself wondering what was she thinking? On this particular day we had two duzies!

Ellie got on top of her table and then realized she couldn't get off.

Like a good mom i kept her there long enough for photo op!

Ellie sitting in a pot.

GROCERY SHOPPING

2009-07-15T08:39:00.000-07:00

Today is a day I dread every week, but none the less one that I cannot avoid; grocery shopping. In an effort to make one paycheck go as far as it can (which isn’t far) every Sunday I get excited to about buying the paper and cutting coupons. OH YEAH – this has replaced sex! If you plan and organize you can really save some money here. Sunday is coupon day, followed by grocery shopping the next week. Our list is never out of the ordinary; we eat meat and lots of it, we drink milk and there is always chef boyardee in our house! We aren’t on any diet plans or all natural kicks, and no matter how little money we have in the bank we always have beer chilling in the fridge! Priorities people.

The websites I use for coupons are couponmom.com, coupons.com and shortcuts.com. They are very easy to navigate and print off from. If, like myself when I first started, you cannot be bothered with cutting coupons I love shortcuts.com because there is no cutting or printing involved. You enter your grocery card in the computer, and the coupons are sent electronically to your card! HELLO GENIUS!

Another great way to cut back is to use the weekly flyer as your dinner guide for the week. This highlights sales and helps you navigate around the store without going over budget. I make a list of meals for the week based on the flyers. In our house if you use it up you write it down. We always have an ongoing grocery list so I’m not running back and forth the store all week for one or two items, that’s when you start to spend more money then you account for. I’m usually pretty good about sticking to the list, although I do allow myself 2 non-list items every week. This cuts down on my splurges – which at 8 months pregnant can be costly!

Something else to keep in mind is losing your mind! For anyone who has been pregnant you must remember thinking you were losing your mind on more than one occasion; I call this my baby brain syndrome. When I was pregnant with my first daughter I went out for groceries (with no list) and come home with a jar of pickles, which I hate, mustard, one potato and a can of chicken broth! My husband responded to my wonderful shopping with “and what are we having for dinner tonight?”

FALSE ALARM

2009-07-14T17:12:00.000-07:00

This morning at 230 we had our first false alarm. I won’t go into great detail but I thought my water broke. This would mean that Emma would be here 6 weeks early. My worrying about if she would be alright kept me up until 430, that and my house – what a mess! Yes this is a reoccurring theme in my blog. The girl’s bedroom is nowhere near put together or organized, my bedroom – ugh its become the catch-all for everything and anything, the laundry really needed to get done, and I didn’t have anything packed and ready for the hospital yet. But wait – no contractions? Weird so I did a quick search on the internet and I came to find out that its not uncommon for your water to break and labor not to start for up to 24 hrs. I’ll admit I’ve never heard of that but WebMD said it then it must be true!

After panic mode for 2 hrs I finally fell back asleep. Woke up to my husband leaving for work and we agreed that if contractions were to start I would call him right away and he would come get me. Ok that’s out of the way now what? Call the dr – right. The conversation went like this:

Nurse: Hello can I help you

Me: Um I’m a patient of Dr so and so and I think my water broke this morning I need to see the Dr

Nurse: We aren’t equipped for that in our office I need you to go to the hospital and check in. They can tell you if your water broke and will page the Dr. Once you check in if your water did break they will not release you, even if you aren’t having contractions.

Me: Um ok – I guess we’re going to the hospital

Hang up call my husband and tell him what the nurse just said. We decided that since I wasn’t having any contractions we were going to wait until he got home for lunch and go. In the mean time I had 3 hrs to clean the house, pack a suitcase, find some NB clothes to take with us, put the car seat in the car, get a crib mattress and vacuum the house – NO PROBLEM! Got just about everything done (I’m good) and started to vacuum when my sister called.

My sister: Um what are you doing? Shouldn’t you be in the hospital?

Me: No I haven’t even had a contraction yet I’m fine! Besides I need to finish cleaning the house.

My sister: I feel like I need to remind you that may be having a baby today.

Me: This is so inconvenient for me right now – I just want to vacuum.

My sister: (laughing) I don’t even know how to respond to that. When she gets older I’m going to tell her you thought it was inconvenient timing when she decided to enter the world.

Me: Well it is – I don’t even have breast pads yet!

That was pretty much the end of that conversation – she could see she was not talking me out of cleaning.

12 o’clock rolls around, my husband gets home, eats a quick lunch and off we go. I was starting to get anxious about my water breaking and me not having contractions when it dawned on me that I could have just peed. God Damnit – everything else has gone to shit during my pregnancy and now I may be losing control of my bowl moments! Oh this cannot be happening.

Check in at the hospital was fast they quickly got us upstairs and into a bed – that was the fastest they moved the whole time I was there. It was rush rush rush, wait. Pee into a cup – wait. Finally 2 hrs after I got there I saw a dr. She told me that my water did not break – Well thank god I thought! It took you two hrs to see me! She checked the baby and everything was right where it should be. Great news I thought – I really need more time to get ready. Then it hit me – shhhiiiittttttt I peed. My husband tried really hard not to laugh at me – it wasn’t the time. But my wonderful sister didn’t hold anything back. When I told her it was a false alarm she yelled – “YOU PEED YOURSELF!” Technically – but I seriously don’t know how – I haven’t done that in years! What started out as an excited and frantic morning turned into an embarrassing and uncomfortable afternoon. After all – have you had to tell your mother – in-law yet that your water didn’t break – false alarm, I just peed myself! I bet not!

ATTACK OF THE ELEPHANT STATUE

2009-07-13T09:40:00.000-07:00

Before it reached 100 degrees today I decided to bring my daughter to the park to play. We played on the swings for a while. She loves the swings! Just sits back, while I do all the work, loving life (sounds a lot like my husband). After I decided I was bored of swinging we moved onto the animal statues. Just as I was thinking oh how cute an elephant, seal and turtle a mountain of water came squirting out of each of them. While my daughter laughed with delight I stood there thinking “what the hell was that!” I’m obviously a slow learner because it wasn’t until after the second waterfall that I realized we were standing in the middle of a small water park! Are you kidding me its only 10 am! Already my day is not going well. While she ran and played in the water I stood there, feeling a bit foolish, ringing out my dress. Deep breath. Ok, now onto the planning of taking out an animal water park. While I sat there, embarrassed and planning the killing of the statues, my daughter was running and laughing with amusement as the elephant squirted water from its tusk and the seal splashed water with its tail. She loved it! After a while she wanted to explore the rest of the park. On we went. The slide provided fun for 2 minutes. The monkey bars, I don’t think so. The mud…OH THE MUD! I looked away for one second to turn on my camera and it wasn’t until I was looking through the lens I noticed she was chewing something. After running through a list of things she had eaten today, and realizing the last thing she ate was at 8 am I became concerned. I raced over to see what in the world she had put in her mouth now and found a great big pile of mud! Well that’s just wonderful. Now I really have parents staring at me. I just got attacked by an elephant, turtle and seal, and now my child was eating piles of mud. Time: 1050. Our wonderful morning at the park I planned only lasted an hour – which inadvertently is long enough for a dozen parents who witnessed this to really feel good about themselves. At least I can help with self esteem issues!

CLEANING 101

2009-07-11T09:15:00.000-07:00

Being that my in-laws are coming to visit today, I thought it would be nice if when they got here our house was, you know, clean. The cleaning process began at 730 this morning. I finally got through the kitchen and our TV room by 1030. OH YEAH, it’s a mess! My daughter being the wonderful helper she is really likes to help me with the cleaning. She will take my rag and dust, walk around and pick things up and hand them to me, even rearranges the dogs dishes to her liking. I swear she was switched at birth because she did not learn to clean from me! Ok I got the two easiest rooms done in only 3.5 hrs. Now it’s onto the family room. This is the room that holds the toy box, some sort of bouncing spinning zebra toy, a Winnie the Pooh car and an endless number of animals that sing the ABC’s. Deep breath, ok here we go; for every toy I put into the toy box my daughter takes 3 out. Grrrr…. This is never going to happen. I mean, how clean does the house really need to be anyway? Ill vacuum put clean towels in the guest bathroom and I always have clean sheets!

Did I mention that we started to pull out all the newborn things? On top of just our everyday mess, I literally cannot sit on my couches because of the piles of clothes and god knows what else from when Ellie was a newborn. My bedroom doesn’t need to be clean anyway, I can just shut the door – oh good idea! Ellies room…well they will understand we are ‘in the process’ of rearranging everything. Yes, that is why the diaper genie is overflowing, and she has clothes all over her floor, and yes that is also why there are shoes and socks strung about as if she was seeing just how far she could throw. Well, it just may stay like that for now, but I will at least take the diapers out and put a new bag in there. We don’t need it to smell on top of all that now do we!??

UGH, 230 and im ready for bed. I did get the toys put away, and diapers out…then I stopped! Now here I am, ordering a pizza and willing my daughter to go down for her second nap so I can nap too. Just a day in the life of a stay at home mom!

MEMORY LOSS

2009-07-11T09:11:00.000-07:00

Is it bad I can’t remember what we did yesterday? Looking around my house right now I can tell you it wasn’t clean and I definitely did not touch the pile of laundry that is keeping us from using the back entrance of the house. Surely it had to be important because why else didn’t these other things get done. Ok – so I don’t usually pull the “I’m pregnant card” in fact my husband only allows me to say it once a day, but I AM! So when I asked my lovely husband if he remembers what I did yesterday he responded with “well when I left for work you were still sleeping, when I got home from lunch you were on the couch, and when I got home at the end of the day you had moved from the couch to the floor.” Humm, now that doesn’t sound like me at all! Dear god was that really all I had done! No – I said in anger! We went to the Dr's today! HA! After saying that out loud to him I couldn’t help but laugh at myself. It isn’t like I have nothing to take care of at home. The babies things are starting to pile in the tv room. The girls room is so disorganized right now that my husband gets angry just walking in there. I’m pretty sure there are some dirty diapers in the bathroom where she gets a bath every night. Yeah, you could say I have plenty to do. Maybe we can try this again tomorrow. After all, my in-laws will be here to visit and I think my husband has started to invite everyone we know over so that I have to pick up the house! IM ONTO HIM! I may just leave one dirty diaper in the guest bath room despite him!

MOMS DAY OUT

2009-07-10T08:20:00.000-07:00

It was decided, by my husband that I needed to find a play group for our daughter so that she could socialize with other kids, but also so that I could have some time off. Now doesn’t that sound wonderful! And I had to agree she needed some time away from me to be around other kids and adults. So I started the search for a play group and low in behold I found one through our church. I have to be honest, this request of my husband’s probably started about 6 months ago and I have been putting it off. Now, at 33 weeks pregnant I realize that maybe it’s not such a bad idea for both she and I. She can play, I can sleep – everyone wins! I contacted the mom who was running the Moms Day Out through our church and after a 30 minute phone call I decided that I would check it out and see what it was all about. The schedule is really nice. They meet every Wednesday, and you alternate which Wednesday s you stay to supervise the kids. They are split up by age so the little kids play in one room and the bigger kids play in another. There is snack time, story time, arts n crafts and movie time. Doesn’t this sound like a dream, I thought. I went to check it out and only made it about an hour before I ran to my car and drove home where I promptly told my husband “I’m mortified! Never again!” In theory this sounded like a dream – in reality it was my nightmare. There were big kids mixed with little kids. The bigger kids were very rough, pushing and knocking over the smaller ones, there was food all over that everyone was just grabbing, at one point I looked over at my daughter and she had someone else’s sippy cup in her mouth! That was the final straw for me! I felt like I was in Spain running with the bulls! Simply put it was chaos everywhere! Now, you should know that I’m not a regimented person, but I like to think there is such a thing as organized chaos in our house. This was terrifying to me.

After leaving there I told my husband it takes a very strong mom to drop her child off at daycare everyday and leave there knowing that they are safe and watched after. We may try another group someday, but for now I am very happy playing with dolls and chasing my daughter, even if I am exhausted at the end of the day.

CRYING WOLF

2009-07-09T19:48:00.000-07:00

Right now my husband is lying on the floor of our bedroom, grabbing his stomach and moaning. It may not be the right time but timing was never my thing. I am fighting the urge to blurt out ‘Whatever you are going through right now is nothing compared to labor!” One upset stomach and he’s all ‘ahhh I think I’m dying.’ YEAH WELL PUSH A CHILD OUT OF YOU! I’ve never really been one for sympathy, and as my due date closes in on us I’m really not the one to come to for an ‘its ok honey’ – unless of course you are an adorable 13 month old by the name of Ellie. Even while he lies on the ground in pain I feel like showing him a slide show of the birth of our first daughter. Is that wrong? This is how bad I feel – I’m sitting here typing this as he is “dying” from pain. Call me any name you want I probably deserve it. But unless a child comes out of him in the next ½ hr I’ve got nothin’!

REALITY CHECK

2009-07-02T09:28:00.002-07:00

Yesterday was a very busy day. We had both our crib and double stroller delivered. I know this may seem hard to believe but it wasn’t until after I started to put the crib together I thought “Oh my god – what have we done!” PANIC set in. My not so mom side was saying “You are about to have 2 kids under the age of 2 you fool! You cant do this!” My inner mom was the calm one. She reminded me that I really do have an amazing 1 year old, who is smart, loving and fun and that I had a lot to do with that. Guess who won out!?? The not so mom part of me started to cry. Suddenly I felt so overwhelmed by our decision to have 2 so close together. But what was I going to do now? I mean, she will be here ready or not in 9 weeks! I took a deep breath and had to tell myself it will be ok – that we will figure it out. After stepping away from the crib in tears I decided to give myself the night to let all of this marinate. This morning I’m still feeling the pressure of our decision to have two so close in age, but I know deep down that we can do this. It is hard to explain that after 7 months of being pregnant, it hasn’t really dawned on me that I will be a mom of 2 in just a short while. While I can feel her move and kick inside, I almost feel detached from her right now. I hate that I feel this way; after all I am carrying a child inside my belly! You would think that ever expanding waist line would have set in by now – but no! It’s the two cribs in one bedroom that really have me going. Id like to think this feeling is probably normal of any mom who like myself decided to have their kids close in age. After all you are already in the diaper and bottle mode, and lets not forget the no sleep thing! Still, I’m terrified that some part of me (the not so mom part) has finally taken on more then she can handle. My mom side you ask? Can not wait to meet this little girl!

WHO NEEDS SLEEP

2009-07-02T09:28:00.001-07:00

For anyone who has an infant or toddler you learn to live with little to no sleep. Our daughter was sleeping through the night before she started to get teeth, now sometimes she is up 3 times a night and for an hour at a time. Thankfully i have a great support system at home with my husband who helps to tag team her on these nights. Last night was no exception. She had a really hard time getting to sleep in the first place; at one point i thought she was possessed! Screaming, thrashing, kicking and hitting - why you ask? I have no idea! Both my husband and I could get her to fall asleep in our arms, but the mere motion of putting her down in the crib would launch her into a whirl win of screaming. After 3 1/2 hrs of both my husband and I trying everything we could we broke two of our cardinal rules; 1. No sleeping in our bed and 2. No bottles throughout the night. In an act of desperation we did both! All i can say is that tonight we will have some Tylenol before bed to help with the teething...and sleeping!

Temper Tantrums Plus

2009-06-29T07:58:00.001-07:00

It’s begun. You know that stage where if we don’t get what we want we throw our body down on the ground and kick and scream. This is commonly referred to as a tantrum. We have all seen them take place in stores and public places. You try not to look at the mom as you walk by thinking "get a hold of your kid." That USED to be me. Quick to judge how the mom is handling the tantrum, while my head is down trying to ignore the throw down taking place on isle 12. Now – I am that mom whose child is having the melt down. It’s funny how the circle is starting to come back around now that I’m a mom. You never think that will be you - or if you do have a child that starts this behavior you think you know exactly how to handle it; I will be that mom who nips it in the butt right away and it only lasts for 2 seconds, ends with hugs and kisses and a "I’m sorry mommy." Oh, my dreams aren’t even that good to me! Our first tantrum started in all places - Walmart! My list included laundry detergent and diapers - that’s it! And that is how quickly a tantrum can come on. This particular one started over a toy. As we were walking down the diaper isle my daughter spotted a toy she wanted to play with, reached out of the cart and grabbed it...only this particular toy was not on a shelf but belonged the baby sitting in the grocery cart next to us! Mortified i grabbed it back from her and apologized to the other mom. After trying to explain to a 13 month old that we do not take toys from other kids, she proceeded to scream and pull her hair. Im not talking a little im tried scream, no no, this scream was more like i was pulling her fingernails off one by one! As I am seeing red, red being the color of my face at the time, I think I only have two options. Run like hell out of Walmart, put her in the car and go home, or try to address what’s going on, and proceed to checkout. What would you do? I ran like hell!

NESTING: NOT FOR DUMMIES

2009-06-25T20:46:00.000-07:00

It is 10:45 pm right now - baby asleep. Usual bed time is 8 o'clock but today we both took a nap at 530 for an hour, so i knew it would be a late night. All in all, for us, an uneventful day. Swam in the pool - the one in our back yard, still not ready to show my face at the public pool and went to the library where we ran around and tore any book off the shelf she could reach while screaming. No bruises, bumps or scratches today. Since we have started the 10 week countdown to baby 2, I have started the "nesting stage" in my pregnancy. This is really hard to describe if you have not gone through this yet. Its an uncontrollable urge to set up the baby’s room, clean the house, paint - whatever you need to do to feel that you are ready for the baby. I also rearranged all the furniture in our house with our first daughter - only to put it all back the way it was! And you cant even sleep well at night because all you think about is the dusty window sill, or cleaning out the fridge again (even though we all know the fridge has nothing to do with getting ready for the baby) - but this is why its uncontrollable. This time for me i am solely occupied with the girls room - that is trying to fit 2 babies in one room. My first daughter, Ellie, has a beautiful room. All painted, everything put up on the walls so nicely and organized. This week i have gone in there like a tornado and took everything off the walls, spackled any holes and painted, moved the dresser and rocker, and started to pull out her NB clothing and wash it. After pulling up all the baby toys, clothes, swing...etc., i am weighed down with how much 'stuff' we have, and a bit stunned that i do not remember even having 1/2 this! Trying to get these girls in one room is going to be quite the struggle. But with only one guest bedroom in our house, we do not have a choice. Yesterday i put up shelving, took it down, spackled holes, painted....repeated the process. The day ended in a teary eyed phone call to my mom telling her that i think i need to put one of the cribs in the closet to make it all fit! After talking some sense in me, she calmly said, "Erin, how will explain to your guests that one of your children is sleeping in the closet?" Thanks for the help mom!

Pool'n'Poop

2009-06-24T09:22:00.000-07:00

If you live anywhere in the mid-west or south you and i are in the heat wave bus! The words hot and humid arent even enough to describe the weather. Being that i am a stay at home - part of my job is to make sure my daughter has a fun in her day. Today i was determined to get out of the house amidst 102 degree weather and have some fun. She really loves the water and swimming so i decided to take her to our local pool. The hour long process of packing a beach bag beings. Pool toys, check - cooler with lunch - check, sunblock and hat - check check check. Ive got it all, so i think. We get to the pool, and we are having a great time. Shes talking to people, splashing around, going down the slides and then it happens. We are swimming in the deeper water, i am holding her and the area around us starts to turn brown. OH MY GOD! At this point i cant even swim away from what happening (even though everyone else cant get away fast enough). Her swimming diaper has burst and yes folks she was now pooping! There are truly no words to describe how a mom feels at this point. We are in a public pool and my child is having a poop in the water! Remember that check list i had earlier - this was NOT on it! They had to clear everyone out of the pool and clean it - we shut down the pool! Needless to say today i am buying a kiddie pool and we will be spending the rest of the summer in our backyard!

MATERNITY CLOTHING WOES

2009-06-22T06:21:00.001-07:00

Since most of you who are reading this are either moms or have one on the way lets talk maternity clothes. YIKES! Fashion and pregnant do not seem to go hand-in-hand, unless of course you have an endless bank account and can actually buy a whole pregnancy wardrobe from Motherhood maternity or a Pea in the Pod. Now, i have nothing against these stores, actually i really do like their clothes. But on one income with a 1 year old and another on the way my bank account suggests i try less expensive means to clothe my ever expanding body. Lets start here - pre pregnancy i am generally a small person. About 5'3 and 115 lbs. But at now 30 weeks my 140 lbs frame - OK 150ish is seeking some more coverage and style is something im not willing to compromise on. Its hard enough at the end of pregnancy to feel attractive but at least i want to feel huge and ready to burst in nice clothing. Is this really a lot to ask?? Some of my favorite and (key word) affordable places to shop are Old Navy, Gap Maternity and American Eagle. I know you're probably thinking that American Eagle does not have a maternity section - and you would be right. What they do have are great summer dresses that are lose fitting and empire waste lines so they fit even a 30 week pregnant woman! I love all three of these stores. Also, because fashion is so lose fitting right now and empire wastes are really in i have found that I really dont need to buy maternity clothes only larger sizes in regular clothes. This has helped me save a lot of money for only temporary clothing and still feel like i look nice. Of course in a perfect world i would just design my own line of affordable maternity clothes for young hip moms but as my loving husband so gently puts it "lets get real here."

Mom of the year

2009-06-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

Well - here we are. Back from a family vacation that was relaxing, fun and full of sand and sun. Its hard to come back from all that - especially when "back" is Kansas! Today I am trying to unpack everything, clean the house while unpacking, and stay on top of my now running everywhere 1 year old - which is a full time job in itself. While unpacking i notice that my dog Roxxy is following my daughter everywhere licking her leg. Normally i would think nothing of this because there is a good chance there is still some breakfast stuck to her or juice that spilled. But now I'm smelling 'something.' Yes we all know what that means...dirty diaper! As i sit and watch all this i am seriously debating letting this just continue until she is clean! Now - the 'inner mom' says stop this now and change her diaper! The not so mom part of me is saying "its just a little poop it wont kill the dog! Besides, they eat their own poop sometimes!" What to do, what to do. While debating my sister calls so like anyone would do i run my options past her. After laughing for a good part of the phone call she ends with "You certainly are mom of the year." YES I AM i thought....and my 'inner mom' won. Now with a clean a diaper my unpacking and cleaning continues.

Terrible One's

2009-06-02T06:14:00.000-07:00

I've heard friends talk about the "terrible two's." How about we talk about the terrible one's! My perfect daughter is in her terrible one's - which means so is mommy! Up until just recently she has been too good to be true! So good in fact my husband and I decided to get pregnant again pretty quickly. Now at 7 months pregnant and a cranky one year old I'm thinking the next one will be a little while!

Teething! What a nightmare! She was - let me repeat...she was sleeping through the night, always smiling and laughing, on schedule - simply put textbook. Well throw that book out the window because she is writing her own! She just crawls around crying most the day, wants me to carry her everywhere, decided she is going to be a picky eater now, NOT - not even close to sleeping all night. Yes - orajel works great for about 20 minutes then what? I hate to keep her on Tylenol all the time (although lately I'm thinking we may need something stronger!) but i also hate the idea of her being in pain all day. For new moms like myself we are just trying to keep our heads above the water. Just when you feel like you've got your footing, things have clicked and going wonderfully - it changes! As my doctor so gently put it to me - WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD! This never changes. As i sit here writing this I'm overcome my how tired i am. I want to lay on the couch and watch TV the rest of the day. Who doesn't!?? But as i sit here i cant help but think shes sleeping now and finally i can get to the laundry, clean the high chair, maybe eat something before noon today! Yes moms - welcome to the motherhood!

What's Normal?

2009-04-29T13:49:00.000-07:00

A "normal" day for me would be most people's nightmares! Having an 11 month old and being 22 weeks pregnant isn't always a dream, but we do our best to get through the day just to start the next. On today's agenda: vacuum, iron, bills, mow lawn - all this of course in between taking care of and playing with my 11 month old. Status: vacuum - not so much, iron...maybe later, bills will be there tomorrow, mow lawn - what??!! Yes ladies, this is what we do to ourselves. So when the check list (and might i add unrealistic check list) doesn't get done we go to bed at night thinking "what the heck did i do today?" Oh only changed 12 diapers, gave 2 naps, made 7 meals, watched sesame street...twice, chased around an 11 month old, put toys in the toy box, took toys out of the toy box, cleaned bottles, cleaned highchair. I have decided what makes a good day is when i get to eat breakfast before lunch, and a great day would have a shower in it (although i really just think that's overshooting lately!) Not on today's agenda: eat dog toys. Oh did i mention we also have 3...count em' 3 70 lbs dogs. When i say eat dogs toys i didn't mean the dogs were going to town, that would be to easy. No no, i had to pry the dog bones away from my crying daughter who just doesn't understand why she cant eat the dog toys. So while my husband is working hard at his job, most days i feel like I'm just barley surviving mine. Being a stay at home mom is the hardest thing i ever taken on. And i can safely say that after pushing a 8 lb child out! Already 4:30 EST, and I'm counting down the minutes until my husband walks through the door so i can finally pee on my own! This my friends was a good day!